I have said before that I don't really buy the idea of baby-directed parenting. I guess I believe that parents know things that babies don't know about what is best for a baby. They need to eat before they're so hungry they cry, they need to sleep before they're so tired they fall asleep, etc. So, I've felt a little bit like a hard-ass when compared to my more attachment-style parent friends. I sort of keep my voice down and try not to comment when people talk about "feeding on demand" and letting the baby "take the lead." I have a consultant, you see. She came to my house when the baby was three weeks old and showed me how to clip his fingernails, bathe him, take his temperature, etc. And, she advises me via email on how to keep his schedule updated with his development and how to treat his minor medical conditions like cradle cap and spitting up. She also helped me diagnose his acid reflux, along with his doctor. Now, all that said, I have found my divergent point from the routine-focused parents.
It seems that the latter parents, those who don't let the baby "take the lead," have a tendency to buy into a one-size-fits-all philosophy. At 8 weeks, babies should sleep through the night. At bedtime, they need to take a bath, have a bottle from their daddies, read a book, and go to sleep. They should eat every 2.5-3 hours when little and 3.5-4 when bigger. I enjoyed these rules when the baby was little. He was hard to read and I couldn't tell what he wanted so the rules made me feel like he was taken care of, whether or not he was completely glee-ful. Now, I'm getting a little soft. I feel like I can make decisions based on Milo's specific needs and personality. He sleeps well. He wakes up at 4am and wants to be fed, but, frankly, I miss him and want to see him at 4am so I don't mind. I don't want to push him to stay asleep yet. Also, his skin is really dry and he goes to sleep pretty easily so I'm considering dropping the bath a few days a week. Finally, he doesn't seem to be hungry outside of his scheduled eating times very often, but, when he is, I feed him. Another funny thing about the difference between me and my consultant presented itself recently when Milo boycotted his bottle, five days before he needed to start daycare. I asked a few different people what to do. I don't want to criticize, because I asked. I'll just say that I feel differently than my consultant on this issue. I explained to her that, when Milo screamed and turned all red and angry (totally out of character), I caved and breastfed him. She explained to me that, "If you cave he will know 'I can scream, throw a fit and get the breast'." I just think he's too little to know this sort of cause and effect. I think he's unhappy for some reason and that I can give him some room and wait for him to feel better. For the record, he took his bottle the following night without a fuss. I don't know why he spent two nights rebelling but I don't really care.
Here is a very uneventful video of him bouncing himself/his toys in his bouncy chair. I, of course, find it to be the cutest thing in the world. You, maybe, will find that it looks like a baby in a bouncy chair. You should know that he just figured out that he can bounce himself. Also, there's no sound, but when he moves his mouth, he's making an adorable coo.
